This topic contains 174 replies, has 31 voices, and was last updated by  Anonymous 8 years, 10 months ago.

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    you know what i think we have met before do you enjoy going round forums upsetting people ?? you go there start this topic ramble on for a while then leave ,how dare you tell me i am not doing right by my child my daughter has severe autism and severe learning difficulties she is non verbal ,my job is damn hard enough with out people like you telling me that i am damaging my child my daughter does teacch now ,you know why ? because she was excluded, suspended and in the end taught in the cupboard and excluded from any contact with other pupils until we got an out reach worker Autism specialist(yes she came from the best school in the country ) who assessed her and decided the teacch approach would be the best for my daughter ,and so far its been great no there is no proof teacch works or any proof ABA works either and just because it works for your child doesn’t mean it will work for the rest ,but then my child is already damaged goods because i haven’t put her through 40 hours of ABA a week ,and no i haven’t got the money either i am a full time carer to my two Autistic teenagers i am on benefits and i never get any sleep ,where do you expect me to get the money from a magic wand ?? but that just makes me a bad mom doesn’t it ?,well in your eyes it does and i resent that so much i try my best every single day for my kids i have been knocked out and been black and blue but i still come back and fight for my kids i have been fighting my LEA for a year now for a specialist school placement if you want to scream at some one go scream at them
    ABA or teacch which ever any parent uses i respect there views and understand whatever, there doing there best i don’t go around saying this is the way the only way and if you don’t follow my way you are all bad parents with damaged children
    i am not a stupid person the FACT is before my daughters school started using the teacch method with her they called her well in not so many words an unteachable animal ,the specialist school where her out reach worker came from do not just offer teaach they offer many alternatives the child is assessed and it is decided which method will be best for each child as an individual
    my daughter has a preety face and a terrible problem and teacch is helping her and us ,it helps her to cope with the day and life itself i know many mums and dads that have used either methods some speak highly of teacch some of ABA ,but in the end we are all flailing around in the dark and that includes you !!
    I am trying my best and i don’t need people like you telling me other wise but then i am just a bad mum aren’t i



    We’re here, but I guess, predominantly ‘readers’ rather than ‘writers’ (unless provoked!!!) Dave.



    Hi Sandra, Have you tried contacting your MP for help? I know when we had issues relating to our children in Kettering, Phil Sawford, who was then our MP was incredibly helpful and Philip Hollobone, our new MP also is very approachable and helpful. If your MP has ‘surgerys’ its worth attending or dropping them an email. Dave.









    Hi Janey, Having a diagnosis of autism (I would have thought) should not be restricting your son’s access to speech therapy, indeed, I would have thought he would have been more likely to have received speech therapy as it should be written into his statement. We come into contact with a lot of parents who are pleased to get an ‘autism’ diagnosis as this often opens the door to services like speech therapy and additional classroom support/provision. If indeed it turns out that the diagnosis is incorrect it is often the case that the programs designed to help autistic children are equally beneficial to other disabilities. In a mainstream school that our eldest son attended for a short time, all of the children checked his schedule first thing in the morning so they could see what was happening during the day.
    Within ‘Special’ schools that my sons have attended, the staff have all been very intuitive and treated all children in their care as individuals. They would adapt their teaching styles, be they autism specific or otherwise, to fit the child (the advantages of specialist teachers, smaller classes, with additional support) If they felt a child would be better served within a mainstream environment they would be quick to recommend it.
    Our ‘normal’ daughter attended a special needs nursery which was certainly not a problem and the facilities and access to activities there were far in excess of what she would have received in a mainstream nursery, light and dark rooms, soft play, therapy pool etc.
    Whilst I’m sure you’ve already looked at an array of schools and nurserys I would suggest you visit as many as you can, both special and mainstream, speak to the staff and see what they have to offer your son without being too concerned about finding the right label. That way I’m sure you will make the best choice for your child’s needs.
    One thing I would ask you to be careful of, in our experience a diagnosis of autism carries more money for the school, be that mainstream or special, than a diagnosis of any of the other ‘associated’ disabilities. More money = more support for your child.
    Best of luck in finding the right provision. Dave.



    I am happy with autism=more money, however my Local authority seem to use the following logic.

    autism can’t be cured, therefore we don’t need to provide any services, all these children with speech delay have autism, therefore we don’t need to provide any speech therapy, or any other therapies for any of them, Bingo – we have saved loads of money!( until the follow on costs come through of course)

    I am worried that Autism does have strengths as well as challenges, and my son doesn’t necessarily have those strengths, so teaching him using his non-existant autism strengths, isn’t going to go well. In particular he isn’t bothered either way by routine, so you can’t teach him something new using a routine, (praise is much more successful), because he won’t even notice it. My brother in law ( diagnosed with autism) is also not very routine-oriented, but his residental placement are in to it like nothing you have seen. Well this is fair enough, because in a residential home you need routine, or nothing gets done.

    My son doesn’t understand diagrams at all, they may as well by egyptian hierogliphics for all the sense he can make of them. Would you expect a 3 year old to give you a heiroglyph of the sun god ra, when he wants to use the potty? Surely saying “potty”, going to the potty/bathroom, holding privates etc are much more likely signs, yet my son is expected to bring a “PEGS” picture of a toilet, when he wants to go to the loo. It is going to be months or years before he understands black and white line drawings ( if ever-worse case), yet he can say “puddy”, and he can certainly hold his privates! My brother in law does pictures( he does a sign for toilet), and actually understands a considerable amount of language, as long as it is “here-and-now”.

    Everyone seems to be working on my sons “Visual timetable” without checking a) can he understand it?- it would help if it was photos not line-drawings b) does he care?. In so far as he pays any attention to it at all he just throws it on the floor and stamps on it.

    I am annoyed that I have been given so very little help up to now, only endless pointless assessments, where they annoy and antagonise my son, and then are suprised he won’t do their tests. The just seem to have “autism kit-bag” which comes out and gets applied without paying any attention to the needs or reaction of the child.

    We have got some more schools to visit, and my husband is looking into them. We have friend who have needed to go private in this situation.

    If you want to know the name of the local Authority so you can move here, ( which actually several families have, because of the autism focus)- I have a friend with 3 child on the autism spectrum – just e-mail me.

    Max is having a very good week with his speech up to now and has been playing “all fall down” with his NHS speech therapist, and saying more words and phrases every day

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